My first trimester. Where do I start?

Firstly, I didn't know if I was going to make it. And if I did make it, would I ever be the same?

How did you find out you were pregnant?

My period is always regular so when I was about 4 days late I decided to take a test. When I first saw the words "pregnant" on that stick I can't describe the emotions that I felt. They ranged from despair, shock, anxiety and fear to joy, ecstacy and excitement. Michael and I had been relatively careful so I wasn't entirely expecting it - surprisingly though, as I built myself up to go and buy a test, I found myself feeling that I'd be disappointed if it said negative? We both had planned to start trying but not until after our wedding which would have been just under a year away for us.





What were your first symptoms?

Before I even found out I was pregnant, I was going to the loo about 4-5 times during the night. Michael was like to me..."Is everything alright? How long have you been like this?" to which I responded, "Only since I got to Dallas"! I was worried maybe I had a urine infection then joked that it could be that I was pregnant - to which we both laughed off :-/





Was the first trimester what you expected?

Hell no. I don't think anyone ever talks about just how hard your first trimester can be. You have those women who simply breeze through it, like one of my friends literally had no nausea or sickness and could eat whatever and whenever she wanted. THEN there's the unfortunate ones like me who SUFFER!

By about week 6 of pregnancy, my breasts were so sore I had to hold them whenever I got in and out of bed or walking down the stairs because they were that tender. I had to pee about 4 to 5 times every single damn night. But that was NOTHING compared to what else was in store for me. The nausea that hit me at 9 weeks. My gosh. I woke up each morning feeling like I was on a boat out at sea during a thunder-storm. I was so so sick. I'd open the fridge and the smell of food was so bad I'd run to the toilet and throw up. Then I'd go to brush my teeth and at the point of brushing my tongue .... I'd vomit...AGAIN! By this point, I'd feel weak, belly growling, my eyes bloodshot from throwing up but I still had to pick myself up and go to work and try to act normal because obviously I didn't want anyone to know that I was pregnant.



"MORNING" sickness is a LIE.

The sickness lasted ALL day. I couldn't understand why this was happening. I has assumed that you feel a little sick in the morning, possibly vomit and then you're fine? No no no no. I'd be at my desk and then around noon I'd get so hungry but the smell and taste of food made me gag so I was unable to eat which of course in turn just made me feel more sick. The only things I was able to stomach and keep down were plain toast with butter, plain rice and clear coloured drinks (so I resorted to drinking a lot of Sprite to give me sugar and energy) Basically anything with a taste or smell I couldn't eat.



I eventually ended up on Ensure drinks which are a protein shake designed for really sick people i.e. cancer patients. Michael was so worried about me during my visit in December that he went out and bought me a whole box and they literally SAVED ME!!!! When I couldn't eat I would just drink them through a straw and luckily through that I was able to muster some energy to function like a normal human being.


How did you feel during the first trimester?

I felt miserable constantly and then guilty at myself for not being excited about being pregnant. I kept thinking to myself, "what if this lasts for the whole 9 months - how will I survive?". I had no energy to do anything except for drag myself to work and throw myself into bed when I got home. Michael would call or try to skype me and I just wouldn't be in the mood despite missing him :-( All I can say is thank God that by week 14 my nausea subsided and I was able to eat normally again. (well most things - I still can't eat anything spicy and don't really enjoy meat right now either)




Travelling whilst pregnant?

I was 11 weeks when I flew to Dallas and I was dreading it. I got to the airport and managed to get some fruit down me. I plodded off to buy my DVT socks - ain't nobody trying to get blood clots and the risk is higher when you're pregnant. I took one of my anti-sickness pills that my GP had prescribed me to prevent needing to throw up whilst on the plane and also stocked up on lots of snacks for the flight such as crackers, lots of water and some fruits as I knew I'd probably struggle to eat the food on the plane. And I was right. I couldn't stomach the food, but the snacks kept me going. It was depressing not being able to drink the wine because I usually have 1 or 2 glasses on long haul flights to relax me while I watch a film and also knock me out. All in all though, I was relieved to get off the plane, but it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.

I'll be posting second & third trimester updates towards the end of my pregnancy. Stay tuned!

Mwah xoxo

Hi guys, hope you are all having a lovely Tuesday so far.

I've needed to cut my hair for some time now because there is quite a lot of heat damage and also the back was far too long in comparison to the rest of my hair giving me that dreadful mushroom shape afro look.

My lovely friend Simone recommended I go and visit Unruly Curls for some TLC, so I booked myself in and took a trip down to Latimer Road in West London.


I was seen to by the lovely Emma who took the time to explain to me how much should we take off and if I was comfortable with the length and so forth. She kept me informed every step of the way of how much  she was taking off - this is a God send when you are used to ruthless hairdressers that just chop and then send you home crying! Emma even shared her sweets with me (I LOVE sweets lol)

I now have a better shaped afro thanks to Emma and the team and have booked myself in for the next 3 months to get another trim (and hopefully more sweets)

They are definitely worth checking out if like me your curly hair has lost it's shape and needs some va va voom!!!

Have any of you experienced Unruly Curls or anywhere else in the UK that you could recommend?

So this is something I haven't yet addressed on my blog with you guys but I'm actually on a bit of a rollercoaster journey with my hair at the moment. Just over a year ago I made the decision to embrace my hair in it's natural state, so for me, that meant ditching the constant weaves and hair straightening and just working with what God gave me.

After I finished university I started wearing my hair in straight weaves because I just didn't want to have to deal with my afro hair every morning before work. I did this for about 3 years before realising that my actual hair had started to lose its curl pattern and was no longer growing but just breaking off at the ends. I had no love or respect for my own hair I simply took the weave out, washed it and then bam put another weave in and off I was again.



My very good friend Simone has gorgeous natural curly hair and kept saying to me every time we met up - "ditch the weave Tan, embrace your curls please!" I finally decided to listen and began to read everything I could about the natural hair journey.

When I took my weave out for the first time my natural hair was quite short and very damaged so I tried to lay off the hair straighteners and didn't put any weave in my hair at all for a year straight.  I think it got a lot thicker and healthier because of this.




I can't say this journey been easy and there have been soooo many days where I've been tempted to just put another weave in when I look in the mirror and don't see bra strap length hair or the perfect curl pattern like the beautiful curly hair gurus on Instagram. However, I'm determined to learn to love my hair just as it is and although difficult it's a rewarding process seeing the positive growth and the health of my hair.

My curly hair routine

If you have black or mixed race hair like myself then you'll know that our hair is prone to frizzing and drying out so we have to be extra vigilant about our hair care regimes. I read a lot about starting a natural hair journey by doing the big chop. I didn't feel like I needed to do this as I've never chemically relaxed my hair and so I just decided to work with what I had:

1. Take more care to protect my hair

I realised that one of the main reasons my hair probably hadn't been growing as much as it should be was because the ends were simply breaking. I know now that I need to protect the ends of my hair from breakage if I want to retain length. The most common causes of breakage are heat, chemicals and rough treatment. I was guilty of all three. I was constantly assaulting my hair with my GHDs, bleaching it, and brushing it when it was dry.

I stopped straightening and only brought out my straighteners for special occasions when I wanted a change in look every 3 months or so. I've been making a concious effort to keep my ends tucked away as much as I possibly can. I now tend to keep my hair up in a bun most days and when I sleep too so that I don't break the ends whilst sleeping. Many natural hair enthusiasts also recommend sleeping with a silk scarf or pillow, something I'm yet to try.

2. Add more protein my diet

Our locks are largely composed of keratin which is a protein made up of amino acids, so eating protein is so important for growing healthy hair. Protein not only promotes hair growth but also healthy nails and healthier skin. Win win? I'd say so. Protein hair treatments are  a great way for giving your hair that much needed protein especially when it's feeling dry and brittle. I used Nexxus Emergencee Restorative Strength Conditioning Treatment 3.3 Ounce which you can buy here.

3. Massage my scalp

I decided to write this post after meeting up with one of my best friends. We had such a nice recalling some of our best memories and it made me realise just how many amazing things I've experienced so far. I don't ever want to forget them and so this is almost my 'safe-keep' of all my favourite memories. Egypt 2008 with my family. I absolutely adored Sharm-el Sheikh and the people were so lovely. This was the first holiday we had with Rhys and he had all the attention of the hotel staff and the locals which was nice. My graduation 2010. Probably one of my proudest moments to date! Still haven't quite lived down my brother and dad shouting out "brap brap brap" as I walked across the stage to collect my certificate. lol. My 21st bday - my parents spoilt me and we  hired out a restaurant for our friends and family, had a lovely 3 course meal and then partied until the early hours of the morning My 22nd bday  @ Kensington Roof Gardens. I don't remember a lot. I guess that says it all really... Old trafford 2011 Watching my team play from the VIP box was the most amazing experiences of my life to date. Ibiza 2012.  What happens in Ibiza...stays in Ibiza. My old workplace Xmas party at Wembley Hilton 2012 - well any night that involves unlimited free champagne is an amazing night for me. Jamaica 2013